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What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Last Updated: 17.06.2025 00:14

What did your mother say that made your jaw drop?

Well the other day she came into my shop asking for the usual discount and mentioned that she had tickets for the wimbledon Tennis final but couldn’t go.

Do you know what she said mum?

She said, “Oh no I can’t give you our tickets, if we can’t go, well we don’t go - it is just not done to give away final tickets.”

I caught my neighbor leaving his 12-year-old son home alone and he has not come back in 6 hours. Should I call CPS?

“Mum why is my sister such a bitch!”

Oh I said, can my wife have them she would give her right arm to see a Wimbledon tennis final?

What! how could you do that?

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So I said to my sister “ You mean to say that that you leave two empty seats rather than give them to your brother” I replied in astonishment. - “Well yes thats how it works in our circle!” responded my sister.

True - how I loved my mum!

My mother said to me “ Why didn’t you speak to me about this before”

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Well I slept with the president of the Lawn tennis Association year ago, I think he may have remembered!!

What on earth has brought this on, said my mother?

Well son “ I think I might have got you some tickets”

Is dating in college necessary? Why and why not?

What do you mean son?

“Oh come off it mum what would be the point?”

Well she is so snotty, O.K. she may have married a bit of money, I don’t know but she feels she is above everybody else.

How do scientists behave?

About 30 years back, I was speaking with my mother.